America’s Got Talent asked Susan Boyle to come in and perform a song. She chose the song “Perfect Day” written by Lou Reed of Velvet Underground. After her long trip from London to LA, America Got Talent informed Susan that Reed will not allow her to sing his song because he does not like her.

Hearing the information sent Boyle into tears, and we all know she is crazy as it is. This made her cry all the way back to LAX and who knows maybe all the way to London. Boyle decided not to change her song and left America’s Got Talent.

Now beside Lou Reed being an asshole and slapping this on the last minute, America Got Talent should of had their shit together. I hope Boyle was compensated for her round trip travel. Productions should have this kind of stuff taken care of before some one is on their way to sing a song. A contract should of been signed saying he would not revoke at the last minute.

I take everything back I said about Michael Lohan. He is brilliant and even a bigger asshole than I ever thought, but a cunning asshole. Michael seemed like he was actually the good parent in this most recent Lindsay Lohan drama. Seemed he really wishes the best for his daughter and Dina was the bitch who is messing things up. Well, I think it is a combo of the two. The whole family is wacky.

Michael allegedly threw his girlfriend, Kate Major, over a chair and kicked her in the face last week. Major filed a police report and in retaliation Lohan sold nude photos of her to the highest bidder. The nude photos were taken of Major without her knowledge while she was passed out naked in bed. You can see the Kate Major photos at Kikster. They are very very unsafe for work!

Lohan claims “She has no money, no job and she’s been living off of me for the last 8 months… and her dad just cut her off. If she doesn’t stop the nonsense, more and more will come out. I am tired of being used and people who need to make up stories to make money off others. I have more important issues to deal with than Kate Major.” That is his reasoning for selling the photos.

Major says the videos are disgusting and cannot believe he would take those while she was asleep. Here is a video clip of from TMZ of Kate talking to TMZ about the nude photos.

This will only get Major a Playboy deal I am sure. I mean come on girl, Michael was trying to do you a favor. He just made you richer. I’m sure Playboy will pay you a little to show off those salami nipples, at least this time your boob stretch marks will be photoshopped out.

Not only does Michael Lohan get the best dad award, but he also should get the best boyfriend award. A police report was filed against Michael this past Monday around 2pm, claiming that Michael kicked his girlfriend, Kate Major. Kate claims that Lohan kicked her in the face. A few months ago Lohan’s other ex, Erin Muller, claimed that she was kicked in that vag by Lohan.

TMZ reports:

Sources tell TMZ Michael Lohan’s fiancee filed a report with the Southampton Town Police claiming Michael physically attacked her during an argument.

We’re told Kate Major claims … on Monday at around 2 PM, just before Michael flew to L.A. for Lindsay Lohan’s hearing, they began arguing and Michael allegedly shoved her over a chair, injuring her shoulder.

Sources say Major claims while she was on the ground Michael kicked her in the face.

Major claims she went to the hospital and has pictures of her injuries.

We contacted Michael, who told TMZ he got in an argument with Kate on Monday over their upcoming TV show, but he didn’t touch her and she’s making it all up.

Well, no wonder this family is the way it is. You have a violent father and a dumb cracked out mother. No wonder Lindsay and Ali have problems. Now they both just act like cracked out, braless hoes.

Morning Ketch-Up

• Kate Plus 8 kids alright to slave labor–Eonline
• House crew knows how to party–dlisted
• Holly Madison likes to dress up like little naughty girl–Hollywood Tuna
• The good ole days of Madonna–City Rag
• Julianne Hough thought Ryan Seacrest was originally gay–TMZ
• Sarah Palin upset at Bristol for re-engagement to a-hole Levi–Access Hollywood
• Jennifer Hudson and Terrance Howard to play the Mandelas–JustJared
• Simon Monjack’s death caused by the same thing as wife, Brittany Murphy–celebitchy

The Mel Gibson story just gets better and better. I mean this guy should have his own HBO comedy and write for it. He has some of the best one liner’s ever. Him and Judd Apatow need to get together and write a film. As we all have heard “some one” released a tape of Mel’s rants. He talks about how his woman, Oksana, deserved to be hit.

Here are some of the things he said provided by Radar:

You should just f-cking smile and blow me, ‘cause I deserve it.”

“You have no f-cking soul.”

“You need a f*cking bat in the side of the head. Alright, how about that?”

“Threaten ya? I’ll put you in a f *ckin rose garden you c*nt! You understand that? Because I’m capable of it. You understand that?”

“I left my wife, because we have no spiritual common ground. You and I have none! You won’t even f-cking try.”

Oksana: “You need medication.”
Mel – “WHAT!? WHAT!? I NEEEED A WOMAN! Not a little girl with a f-cking dysfunctional c-nt!”

Oksana: What kind of a man is that? Hitting a woman when she’s holding a child in her hands? Breaking her teeth twice in the face! What kind of man is that?
Mel: Oh, you’re all angry now! You know what, you f* cking deserved it!

“You don’t have any f*ucking friends except me, and you treat me like shi*! So that’s why I’m so fucking angry, because I don’t have any friends! And I try and make one from you and you treat me like sh-t and you f-cking used me!”

I mean the line where he says “You should just f#* smile and blow me, I deserve it.” that is classical. I mean it sounds like something out of Pulp Fiction. I mean all these sound great. I think this is all just to get a movie written about Mel Gibson himself. It would make a great one.

Well I hope all our readers and fans had a great 4th of July weekend. I apologize for the long vacation, but everyone needs one. A lot happened over the week and I will try to ketch-up on it the best I can.

One story I read over the weekend that caught my eye was that Elle Macpherson likes to eat endangered species. She is currently getting a lot of crap from international animal-right groups due to a recent interview she did with Times Online. She stated that she is interested in Chinese medicine, and described the taste and effects of crushed rhino horns. As we all know Rhino’s are on the endangered species list. A lot of poachers go out and kill Rhino’s just for their horns. Well obviously Elle McPherson thinks it is alright to do that since she enjoys rhino horns.

Times Online reports:

Witter: You’re said to be a great fan of Chinese medicine. What does powdered rhino horn taste like?
E MacP: A little bit like crushed bone and fungus in a capsule. Does the job though.

Witter: How do you know that it works? A lot of people say Chinese medicine is quackery.
E MacP: Put it this way, works for me.

Witter: Did you find your nickname “The Body” offensive? Sexist?
E MacP: Brilliant name. I trademarked it and built a business out of it. What part of that is sexist?

Witter: What’s the secret of running a successful business?
E MacP: I reckon the secret is passion. We’ve become a global brand, 300 doors in 11 countries during a recession.

Witter: Are you tired of the press? Is it anyone’s business whether you wear a cycling helmet?
E MacP: I’m sure I’ll be slammed again this summer for riding my bike around Notting Hill with a child perched on the handlebars.

Witter: We’ve also been treated to pictures of your cellulite.
E MacP: Thank you! What cellulite?

Witter: What would you have done for a living if you’d been born plug-ugly?
E MacP: Probably just the same thing. Right, little boy waiting at school gate without Mummy. Not a good look.

An animal rights website, Mongabay, responded to Elle’s craziness love of rhino horns.

The consumption of rhino horn, which financially underpins illegal poaching, is both the historic and current driver behind rhino decline worldwide, and in the cases of four subspecies: complete extinction.

As well, currently four of the world’s five rhino species are threatened with extinction, three of these species are considered Critically Endangered. There are less than 50 adult Java rhinos in the world and less than 250 adult Sumatran rhinos.

Poaching hit a 15-year-high last year to keep up with demand for rhino horn. Poachers usually shoot or tranquilize the animal before sawing off its horn. Rhinos often die from bleeding to death.

However poaching doesn’t only impact rhinos, rangers who protect them are sometimes in the line of fire: last month a ranger in India was kidnapped by a group of poachers and murdered with two bullets in his stomach.

Powdered rhino horn, such as Elle MacPherson uses, is not cheap: last year one kilo was worth approximately $60,000, nearly $20,000 more than a kilo of gold.

While there have been discussions of legalizing the trade in order to draw down the price of rhino horn and use the proceeds for conservation, for now the sale or purchase of rhino horn products is banned worldwide by the Convention on Trade in Endangered Species (CITES).

It is said that she supports these poachers by buying crushed rhino horns. Our world is crappy enough due to the fact we kill tons of animals off by destroying our planet. It is even worse when we do it on purpose to fill the need of some rich twat who the medicine may make them feel better.

Long Weekend Ketch-Up

• Anna Faris all naked(NSFW)–Blemish
• Kristen Stewart is afraid she will be killed by paparazzi or fans–Agent Bedhead
• Elin Woods only going to get roughly 100 million–dlisted
• Jessica Simpson with another football player–Eonline
• Lindsay Lohan gets a punch in the face for her 24th birthday–celebuzz
• Dave Chapelle goes crazy on a plane–Socialite Life
• Wow, LeAnn Rimes has an amazing lower body–Egotastic
• Miley Cyrus loves to show off bra–Superficial
• Katie Holmes getting some Glee time–Fablife
• Serena Williams crowned champion at Wimbledon–JustJared

Oh, Johnathan. A couple of weeks ago Jonathan Rhys Meyers was detained at JFK airport for being drunk and an ass. It ended up having him banned from United Airlines. It has now turned out that people are saying he used the “N” word during his drunken stampede.

Tudors star Jonathan Rhys Meyers spewed the ‘N’ word when he was banned from a United Airlines flight due to a drunken display, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.

Radar reported:

RadarOnline.com broke the story that the Irish actor was banned from flying United In early May when he became increasingly drunk and disorderly while pounding drinks early in the morning in the first class lounge at New York’s JFK airport. He was waiting to fly to Los Angeles.

Now RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting that the story is even more shocking and ugly. When airline workers noticed the actor drinking and getting out of control they prevented him from boarding the flight to Los Angeles, a source at the airport told us.

As the incident unfolded, Meyers, growing furious, flung the ‘N’ word, the source told RadarOnline.com exclusively. He had been drinking vodka and it was before 7 am. It is unclear if the actor was directing the word toward an individual or just spewing it without a specific target.

The Tudors star used the racial slur as he was being informed by the airline that they were not going to allow him to board the plane. An airline employee confirmed the incident to RadarOnline.com.

It’s by far the ugliest display of behavior for an actor who has a history of traveling misbehavior. In 2007, seven months after checking into rehab for the second time, he was arrested at Dublin airport and charged with being drunk and in breach of peace (the charges were later dropped).

Then, in June 2009, three months after checking out of rehab the third time, he was arrested after allegedly attacking a number of staff at a bar in Paris’ Charles de Gaulle airport.

I personally don’t think there is going to be really any kind of severe outcome of Jonathan saying the “N-word.” The guy was completely drunk, and I will not be surprise if his reps deny that he ever said it. I mean he was drunk and it could of even sounded like that is what he said. I don’t believe he is going to lose his jobs on the Tudors or anything due to it.

I don’t give a shit, is pretty much what Charlie Sheen seems to say by giving his kids up. Sheen no longer has legal custody of his daugthers, Sam and Lola. He gave up his custody to wife, Denise Richards, due to the mess Sheen has been in. Richards was always nervous about letting her kids go to her ex-husband’s house. Sheen went easy on this one and just turned the kids over instead of fighting it in court. Sheen still sees his children, but usually with Denise around. He currently pays 50K a month in child support. I would love to have that kind of pocket change or allowance. I mean Denise acts too, how come she needs that much money in child support? You can easily support two children for 1000 a month.

Morning Ketch-Up

• Kristen Stewart poses for Elle magazine–JustJared
• Kenny Chesney’s house goes under due to floods–Eonline
• Kim Kardashian receives death letters about Justin Beiber–dlisted
• True Blood, the comic–Pink
• Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise dance on stage–celebitchy

Call in the cavalry, Gloria Allred is sticking her noise into every tramps business. Allred has now jumped on the mistress of David Boreanaz and wants to represent her. Boreanaz, star of Bones and Angel, came clean on Monday and said that he had an affair. Most people suspected Rachel Uchitel, but reports are now saying it is not Uchitel. The mistress tried to black-mail Boreanaz, like all mistresses do, but he came clean. He did not name his mistress, but now Allred said that the mistress will come out here soon.

Radar stated:

” The woman who had an affair with Bones star David Boreanaz is going to tell her story publicly RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.

Gloria Allred, the woman’s attorney, told RadarOnline.com “Now that Mr. Boreanaz is attacking her she has decided to tell the story of their relationship, so that the truth will come out.”

This is a departure from a statement Monday night when Allred said that because Boreanaz was attacking the woman, “I do expect that she will want to tell the story of their relationship” but stopped short of saying that the woman would definitely come forward.

But Allred confirmed to RadarOnlne.com on Tuesday that the woman has now decided she will now go public and tell the story of her affair.

“She is not going to be intimidated,” Allred told RadarOnline.com.

The Boreanaz affair has become one of the most contentious public battles in recent memory, with Allred representing the unnamed lawyer and L.A. heavyweight lawyer Marty Singer repping Boreanaz.

Boreanaz announced Monday that he had an affair, saying he was doing it because the woman was demanding money. The words “extortion” has been used repeatedly by Boreanaz team in connection to this situation. And Boreanaz did, in fact, pay the woman twice but balked when she demanded six figures and hired Allred.

Singer is outraged at what he perceives as the growing trend of extortion of public figures by people who threaten to expose their affairs. Allred said she was retained after Singer attempted to contact Boreanaz’s mistress.

“Marty Singer attempted to contact a woman who had a romantic relationship with David Boreanaz. She then retained me. (This woman was not Rachel Uchitel.) I then contacted Mr. Singer on her behalf to find out why Mr. Singer was calling her. We discussed the possible resolution of my client’s legal claims against Mr. Boreanaz by mediation. My client has not told her story to the press, but now that Mr. Boreanaz is attacking her she has decided to tell the story of their relationship, so that the truth will come out. This baseless attack by David Boreanaz and his highly paid legal mouth piece in an apparent effort to divert attention from his client’s extramarital infidelity will not succeed. If they think that I or my client will be intimidated they are wrong.”

Allred told RadarOnline.com that the woman has not decided how or where she will tell her story. She also said that in response to reports Rachel Uchitel is going to have a press conference denying she attempted to extort Boreanaz, “Rachel has no press conference scheduled with me. I have no plans for that.”

As RadarOnline.com revealed, Uchitel had an affair with Boreanaz before she had an affair with Tiger Woods. Her affair with Boreanaz was first exposed by Star magazine.

“Rachel has not asserted any claim against David Boreanaz in the past,” Allred told RadarOnline.com. “I have no comment on their relationship.”

And when asked about Rachel’s multi-million dollar payoff from Tiger Woods, a fact first reported by RadarOnine.com, Allred said: “Rachel has no comment on Tiger Woods.”

It is terrible that Boreanaz cheated on his wife, terrible that any man does it. When comes fame come great responsibility, haha. Anyways, women will sleep with some one famous just to say they did it, or to hope to get money later on. Those are usually the two options that are out there. Now this whore that he was screwing is trying to get money to keep her mouth shut should be put in jail for blackmail. Why do none of these mistresses stand trial? If people know they have been paid hushed money, they should be charged. Anyways, Gloria Allred is just out there. She likes representing these gold-digging sluts who believe they were taken advantage of. My Robin William’s hairy ass they were ever taken advantage of, every mistress knows what she is doing. Allred, be a real lawyer, do something useful and meaningful.

Morning Ketch-Up

So after a long speculation, David Boreanaz admits that he cheated on his beautiful wife. Boreanaz is the star of Bones, and before that Angel. He camae out and said that he was unfaithful to his wife of nine years, Jaime Bergman. Boreanaz tells People magazine that he wants to be open and was irresponsible for what he did. He decided to tell him the magazine this after a mistress threatened to contact media outlets so she could get more money from him. He stated that he felt like he was being blackmailed by her.

People are speculating it was celebrity whore, Rachel Uchitel. Uchitel got a huge payload from Tiger Woods and probably got greedy and wanted more money and asked David for some, or it may of happened before that. Anyways, I do not see why these women would not be arrested for trying to get paid to keep their mouth shut. It is blackmail. Instead the entertainment business awards these girls for opening their legs and give them jobs on tv shows.

Morning Ketch-Up

• Naomi Campbell puts on an act for Oprah–celebitchy
• Thank god to Photoshop, Madonna looks like she never aged–dlisted
• Jason Wahler of the Hills heading to jail–Eonline
• MET Costume Gala photos–PopSugar

Well it’s official people. Starting next month Hulu will be charging you $9.95 a month to watch their once free television shows. Some shows like Glee, SNL, and Lost will still be available for free since they are so highly rated. Most other shows though will not be accessed unless you pay the monthly fee.

Hulu has complained they have not made as much profit as they would like off of their television shows from advertising. Majority of the people who use Hulu are under the age of 35.

Hulu, this is why your business model is going to fail. People under 35 barely pay for music as it is, why would they pay for television. Secondly, I will go the the network’s website and watch the episodes for free before I would come to Hulu and pay. I enjoyed Hulu because it kept shows organized for me, but with high speed internet I am willing to take an extra 10 seconds to click to another page and watch it for free. Hulu should put up maybe one more ad before they try this method. This method is going to fail and Hulu will lose a lot of money. They will see that after 4 months that their profit has drastically dropped they will go back to the free model. You do not give away something for free and then charge people. That is not good business practice on Hulu’s part. If i’m paying $9.95 a month there better be no commercials either on any website or video i’m watching.

Morning Ketch-up

• More girls come out about Steven Segel–CelebNewsWire
• Michael Lohan escorts police to Lindsay’s pad–Eonline
• The Restoration of Stephen Baldwin--Site
• Madonna looks like she wants this young boy–dlisted
• Jillian Michaels said she would adopt a child before ever letting her body go to wreck–Celebitchy
• Michael Lohan explains his actions for earlier–TMZ
• Gabourey Sidibe would so do Andy Samberg–JustJared
• I knew Bea Arthur wasn’t dead, instead she is doing PETA ads–Popeater
• For the ladies, Jake Gyllenhaal shirtless–PopSugar
• New True Blood Poster–PINK